You know when you are hurting, nothing else really matters around you.

I become a very selfish person when I’m hurt.

I’ll be the first to admit it.

I’m selfish.

There, I said it.  Now, don’t go blowing up the comments on here saying “it’s about time she figured that out!!”

Do I want my LOA?  Um, yes.  That is the understatement of my life right now.

Is this wait extremely hard.  Um, again, yes.

Especially when you see families get theirs before you.

Again, I’ve already acknowledged, I’m selfish.

But when you get a phone call at 1:30 a.m. from a precious family member that is hurting beyond belief, you start to understand, “hey, maybe there are worse things out there than not getting my way on my timeline”.

My heart broke in pieces for this precious person.  I’m crying as I type now.

I woke up this morning thinking, this wait, not so bad anymore, when put into perspective.

There are so much worse things out there than waiting.

Like getting a phone call when your on a mission trip to Peru telling you your 46 year old mother has unexpectedly passed away from a brain aneurysm.

That was devastating.

Still is devastating.  She would be my biggest supporter of this adoption.

She was the absolute best Grandma.

I miss her everyday.

My mom holding Taylor after he was born.

So, perspective, I need to get some.

I love that I have a daughter in China.

I love that I will be able to go get her when the time is right.

I love that there is hope at the end of this story.

And, maybe I should be enjoying this “calm before the storm”!!  – Um, credit for that term goes out to my Cuz Marjorie Harris!!

I haven’t had to miss a full nights sleep in like 10 years now!!  🙂

Thank you to my friends and family for your prayers and support.

They are definitely felt!!

Day 92 of our wait for LOA………………………